Lately I’ve been thinking of myself as a 37 year-old woman. I am not 37, at least not yet. I won’t be 37 for several months but I’ve somehow started referring to myself this way, as in “I’m 37 and shouldn’t be acting like X, Y or Z.” That kind of thing.
While I am closer to 37 than I am to 36 now, I don’t know what has compelled me to make myself that much older already because 36 is a perfectly lovely number. Just look at it with its smooth, rounded curves that suggest bounce and fun. Thirty-seven, on the other hand, is obnoxious with the severe angle of the 7 jutting out like some jokester sticking his elbow in your ribs. Hey, you’re thirty-seven. Get it? Your’e OLD.
I remember how mortified my mother was at turning 40. It was as though life was going forward and she was being dragged along with it. She told a lot of people for a long time that she was 39. She did this with her tongue planted firmly in her cheek because she knew eventually nobody would believe her. You can stop getting older but you can’t stop aging.
I’m not freaking out about my age yet, though it hardly seems possible that I’m approaching 40. There’s that obnoxious angle again in the four, that elbow in your ribs telling you you’re REALLY old. I’m sure at some point 40 will look better than 50 or 60, an age my mother will become friends with shortly after I claim my 37, but I have yet to look in the mirror and see a woman that close to what many people consider MIDDLE AGE.
Nathan turns 40 next year and is getting his coveted HDTV. He knows this because I have told him he could get the TV so I wouldn’t have to hear more yammering from him about wanting a flat screen. I also promised him the TV because one should be given expensive electronics for certain milestones, though my plan has backfired some because now all I hear is, “I think I want to go with an LCD instead of a plasma.” Seriously, he’s told me this about five times already and we are at least six months away from shopping for that TV.
What I’d like to receive for my 40th birthday are enlightenment and courage. I’d like those two things packaged up with the secret to permanent weight loss. As far as Nathan is concerned though, I’ll probably be asking for a sweet lens for my camera.
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I’m 33 and I keep finding myself forgetting it. I don’t *feel* that old. I often look at my kids (ages 9 down to 2) and have a hard time believing that I’m fully responsible for these people. Some people in #knitty chat were actually discussing the concept of growing up versus growing older. We determined that some of the younger people were more grown up than the older (and it was decided that I am definitely NOT grown up).
Enjoy the lens. it’ll be easier to get than the other items. Those, well, you just gotta find them in you.
I could go with the weightloss thing…
But a sweet lens would be fun too! I need one with a really low F-stop.
Oh, and don’t complain about him wanting an LCD. They are way better, and way cheaper in the long run. I’ve heard that plasmas use like 3 times more energy to run.
Such parallels we have in life. My husband turned 40 in April, big issue for him. I am a little older than you, having turned 38 in June.
My goal at my 40th birthday is to find the healthy me, that I somehow lost at 30, seriously I fell apart shortly after my 30th birthday.
Enlightment would be cool also.
heheh…you just gave me an idea for my birthday…;-)
Ya know 40 isn’t all that bad…I remember how upset I was as 40 approached…I think part of it had to do with the fact that I was a single mother and thinking I was going to be alone forever…I was a grandma at 36…but, the thing is I never felt “old”…I still felt “young” inside(and most days I still do) and remembered what my grandma had always told me, “it’s just a number, your only as old as you feel” and then she would add something like “I feel like I’m only 40″ when in reality she was in her 80′s!
In July I turned 46 and I don’t know how 46 is suppose to feel like and I will joke about feeling or being old and my kids will tease me… but if I’m really honest, I feel pretty darn good and I am happier in my life than I ever have been, even though I am going through lots of changes in my life and have had lots of stress, I am still better then I was when I was in my 30′s. Right now I am doing a lot of self reflecting and taking a look at what I can do to make my life even better…I know I need to get back into exercising, eating healthier, reading more, doing things for myself, because when I do these things I feel better about myself.
Be good to yourself…treat yourself well and that will be reflected in your happiness which in turn will give you courage and anything else you are looking for and you will be able to do anything you set out to do. From reading your blog, I see that you have a beautiful, loving heart and you express yourself well…you have a wonderful husband and beautiful daughter…these are all things that will keep you young no matter what number you are!
I loved your post. I’m 33, I know it’s young but while the one side fools you with it’s round bubbly fun, it occasionally prods you in the rear with the six points on the other, kind of like pitch forks.
Occasionally I’m surprised by age, not the number, I know how old I am. But somewhere in the back of my mind I think I’m still a cool and happening twenty something, or that perhaps I still resemble a teenager. Then a cashier will call me ma’am and the illusion fades.
#1 — If you let Nathan buy a Philips, I will personally drive up there and kick both of your asses. Save yourself the nightmare that comes with that company. Just saying.
#2 — I love your positive attitude about your upcoming birthday(s). It’s refreshing to see. With each year that goes by, I think to myself “Now maybe other people will take me seriously, as I’ve gained a year of experience”, but I tend to forget that those “other people” are also aging! So now I’m just giving it up and trying to convince myself that age is just a number.
Meg-I forgot about the problems you had with Phillips. I’ll have to remind Nathan of that when the time comes for us to shop.
Also, there’s just something I’m not liking about 37. I don’t know what it is, but hopefully it turns out to be a good year for me.
mrsbear-I think “ma’am” is brings us all down to reality. That and gray hair. I still feel young inside, but the outside says something different.
Mama Bear-my goal is to also get healthier by 40. I don’t know if I’ll be able to get to my ideal weight by then, but I’m trying. My metabolism is so much different after giving birth. The pounds are not coming off like they used to.
My husband hasn’t really said much about turning 40 yet. He’s 38 as well, but his birthday is in December so technically he will be 40 next year. I keep reminding him of that.
Krista-one of the things my husband keeps telling me is that LCD TVs are better than plasmas. I’m becoming very educated
Zanne-I don’t feel very grown up either. When my mother was my age, I was almost fourteen years old. I can’t even imagine being the mother of a teenager. Being the mother of a toddler is work enough. Like you said, it’s scary to think we’ve been trusted to raise these kids to be respectable human beings.
Thanks for stopping by and commenting.
They’re just numbers, right? Half the time I forget how old I am (I’m 36 too – I just checked my license to be sure). My husband is 2 years, 364 days younger than me, something he’ll never let me forget.
I crossed the 40 by just a bit. You know, I am loving it. I seem to have become more content with who I am. I know most women battle with the weight issue. I do. It is different now. I don’t feel like I have to be the bathing beauty anymore. With children, our focus turns….and that is good.
This is my first time over to your blog. I love it.
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