Yesterday morning I woke up ridiculously early. It took me at least a half hour to get back to sleep after finding the right position and right amount of comforter coverage, but I eventually drifted off until my alarm started beeping at 6:03. In that hour and a half I had a strange dream. For some reason the morning hours produce the most bizzare and vivid scenarios that stick with me the rest of the day and yesterday was no exception.
In this dream Nathan, Autumn and I were sleeping over at his brother Roman’s house. We put Autumn down to bed but had forgotten to put a Pull-Up on her. She woke up wet and when I went in to get her I discovered someone had cut her hair so that it looked similar to this:
So there was my three year-old with a one year-old’s haircut and I freaked. Who could have done this to my child? Granted, whoever it was had done a pretty good job with the cut. I mean, she didn’t look like Animal from “The Muppet Show” or anything, but who cuts a child’s hair without checking in with the mother first?
It turns out it was some imagined dream-friend of one of Nathan’s twin nephews. I was livid and wound up calling this dream-friend’s dream-mother at the Mobil station where she worked. The mother tried to talk me down from my hysteria, but there was really nothing anyone could do. Autumn’s hair was gone and I was heartbroken. Everyone else in the dream thought I was silly. It’s hair, they said. It will grow back.
I’ve dreamed about hair before and most of the time it’s a nightmare in which I lose mine or get a really bad cut. I think the dream represents several things going on in my life right now, but when I woke up I recalled the story I had told Autumn when I put her to bed the night before. Every night for the past week she has asked me to tell her a story about what she was like when she was a baby. The story I wound up plucking from my narrative reservoir was an account of how she wasn’t able to hold her head up until she was several months old and as a result created a little bald spot on the back of her head. This fascinated her and I promised to show her the photographic evidence some day. Last night I told her about how she used to have really messy diapers that would blow all the way up her back. I don’t think I want to experience any dream inspired by that story.
I have dreamed of poop before. Dog poop and baby poop. When I was a kid I used to have recurring nightmares involving sharks. In my young adult years, shortly after I met Nathan actually, I had recurring dreams about losing my teeth. Back in my seriously vigilant Weight Watcher days I’d actually have dreams about pigging out and wake up relieved that I hadn’t gone off plan.
So what crazy dreams have you had? Any recurring themes? Bizarre encounters with celebrities? I’d love to hear them.
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Hmm. I’ve dreamed that a styrofoam ghost woman was suffocating me. I’ve dreamed I was dancing with those Riverdance people and I couldn’t believe I could actually do the steps. I dream about waiting tables a lot; you know, the one where you’re in the weeds and you can’t move your feet because you’re wearing heavy shoes?
There are lots more but I’m either scaring you or boring you at this point, I’m sure.
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I have dreams at least twice a week about my teeth falling out. It’s weird and freaks me out.
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